In 2011, the USPS said, “Enough with all these tiny, incremental stamps needed to make up the difference when we increase rates!” Well, actually, I doubt anyone said anything of the sort. However, 2011 did see the introduction of the “forever” stamp and it’s been with us ever since. I’d like to think that everyone reading this knows fully well what a forever stamp is, but as being wrong is something of a hobby for me, I’ll err on the side of telling you what you already know. This is in no way a reflection of my gauge of your intelligence. Honest.

Forever stamps are assigned no visible value. Instead, they will always be worth the cost of first class postage for a letter weighing up to one ounce. In theory, you could buy a sheet today for 55 cents each and, in a few years when we’ve let the USPS fall to ruin, they will be worth $8 each or more. Kidding. They’ll be worth nothing because there will be no USPS. MAIL STUFF NOW! And text USPS to 50409 — maybe you can help prevent this catastrophe.