The next 9 days of COVID Cards will be a challenge. Hanukkah (I am choosing the more common spelling over the traditional spelling, Chanukah, because I’m more common than traditional; thank all the gods if I’ve learned anything about my Jewish friends, it’s they are way harder to offend than my Christian friends — see what I did there, I offended some Christian friends, didn’t I?? Oh, well, I do apologize, but don’t help me prove my point so easily next time — ugh, I did it again — and now this is the longest parenthetical known to COVID Card-dom and you probably don’t even remember what this sentence was supposed to be about…) starts tomorrow night (I’m writing this on December 9th) and ends in the evening of December 18. It was tough deciding if I should make nine Hanukkah cards early enough for them to arrive during Hanukkah or if I should make them during Hanukkah. I chose the latter, but then I had to decide, do I want to draw the first card on the 10th or mail the first card on the 10th? Do I make 8 cards for the 8 days of Hanukkah? Or 9 for the nine evenings/candles? Oy vey.

With all this mishigas, you might think this schlemiel was a meshugenah — you might be right, but lest you think I’m also schlimazel (a schlimazel?), let me just tell you that I just now, today, learned what the opening words to Laverne and Shirley meant (but who was the schlemiel and who was the schlimazel?), that’s got to be worth something.

Epic digression.

Finding 9 mail-related Hanukkah topics is not going to be easy. You can bet your tuchas that I’m going to give it my best shot, though.*

We’ll start in 1996 when the US issued its first Hanukkah stamp. That’s right. 34 years after the first US Christmas stamp was issued, Hanukkah finally got its day in the mail (and from what I’ve read tonight, I imagine lots of Jews shrugged their shoulders, rolled their eyes, and went about their business). The stamp featured a menorah and the word Hanukkah, which means “dedication.”

So ends my shpiel. Now I shall go take a schvitz — not really, but it sounds nice.

*My best shot has taught me that there really isn’t Hanukkah mail trivia and it has taught me why (or at least “why” according to some). I’ll cover that in a later post. Spoiler alert: maybe I should have made Rosh Hashanah cards in September.